Skills I gained through being a collegiate in a GLO

Dear Blog,

Remember when I said I would love you the week that I decided to make you, and then the next week I would forget about you? Hi, I'm back. In my life as a Post-Grad, it seems I need some mental stimulation in order to keep me busy, and to help me to avoid unpacking my life.

Some good news for you: For a final project in one of my classes, I started reminiscing about my life, and so, I have plenty of great anecdotes mulling around in my head right now. Nostalgia is something, right? Yay for new (see: old) material.

Anyway, Post-Grad life is alright; I've mostly been unpacking. I have, however, been seeing two alumni brothers of Beta Phi, so clearly I am enjoying myself a great deal. And the Evan/Brody/whatever drama I had been having the last time I posted had gotten worse, but is now mostly out of my mind.

I say mostly because the thing about Evan is that I have something like ninety-nine good memories of him and one bad one, so when I get nostalgic, it's all rainbows and fluffy kittens and such.

The thing about Brody is that he pops up when I've all but forgotten about him or decided that I am ridding my life of him because he is poison. But he never pops up when its convenient for me. Not when I needed his Home Depot expertise to help me figure out what special plant fertilizer my rose plant, Omega, needed or when finals were stressing me out and I needed a drink (thank goodness for Cinco de Mayo). No, instead he pops up after I have decided I'm done with his drama and when he needs help finding an eighties outfit for some party... I am a bit confused, but excited that theme parties still exist outside the college world. Theme parties are my favorite.

At the moment, I am a bit annoyed that he didn't even thank me for my outfit suggestion (eighties hairband=awesome), but, more than that, I am annoyed by what he texted me to get said suggestion in the first place. "... I need your advice... Not even sure you'd know... But... Alas... I need to know what to wear to an 80s party... Any recommendations?"

First of all, starting off a text with "... I need your advice..." is never a good thing. In fact, I opened my text inbox expecting a message from my Beta Phi Brody (Yes, yes, another man named Brody... Apparently I attract Brodys and Evans in droves... Yay for me...), and instead saw "I need advice" from Brody Slater and I went from angry (Like hell I'm giving you advice on your new little squeeze!) to curiosity (Why are you asking me and not her?). So I opened it and was met with a question of my ability to dress for a theme party?

Seriously, the part of this whole thing that annoys me most (other than not being thanked) is the fact that he didn't think I could help him find an outfit for a theme party... What did I do while I was in college?

Oh yeah, I was Greek.

Anyway, despite how this started off as a "Brody, you're an idiot" style rant, it's actually about things I learned/abilities I gained as a member of a GLO. Watch out, the list is vast!

1. Theme party extraordinaire. It started the idea for this post, so of course it needs inclusion. Since there are apparently theme parties outside of college, I will walk into the world with a head for costuming and a box full of costumes to aid me in this endeavor. When will I ever need an entire cheap orange outfit? Probably never. But, if five friends and I are attending a rubix cube party, I can supply each of us with the required orange article and then successfully complete my outfit quickly. Especially if each of the five friends picked a color in advance and then distributed it amongst the six of us.

2. Photographer. Can you fit four people in a picture and center it without obscuring anyone? Can you do it when one of the people in the picture is you? I can. I can even fit five people, one still being me, in a picture with decent results. I know, I know, you don't think it's possible, but it absolutely is.

3. Networker. This can find you a date to a mixer. It can also find you a job later. So really, it's pretty much good for everything.

4. Dancing. Choreographed dances, meet your dearest friend in the near future.

5. Keeping a secret. I already had this ability, but it never hurts to add to it.

6. Sorority squats. They just make a picture look nicer. My future wedding photos will be fabulous, believe me.

7. Leadership skills. This goes without saying. But my WPM is baller. Also, I can prepare a house for a fire inspection, and not just a house, but a mansion.

8. Having a beautiful smile. It's hard to look good in a majority of photos. Sorority life has helped me to achieve this.


And, I will probably finish this later... Just wanted to post.